Letting Go…

At times, I find that I am fighting for things to happen in this life.

Fighting by way of punching air, not hitting anything but I have the best gloves and the best right hook and by God…

I am fighting with all I have, with great force! 

I also find … I am most times fighting for a job, a relationship, a task, a destination – that will let me down again, dismiss me, and take me and my effort for granted – over and over and over. Why am I fighting for these things?

What is this fight really about? 

Today, I choose to fight … To Let Go!

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Date: 8/9/17

Written By: Beverly Stephens

Photo: Taken w/ iPhone 6 Plus – by Beverly Stephens

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My Son & TBI

My son was born on Christmas Day…this was such as beautiful gift … I can not even express the gratitude I have for this event …

The years flew by and during the summer of my sons 17th year of life he was hit by a van that was traveling at 45 mph while he was crossing the median on his skateboard.

He was flipped up and over the van due to impact and landed on the pavement below.

He was instantly lifeless… and not expected to live.

When I arrived at Children’s Hospital I was greeted by the Chaplin and a Social worker … my son was NOT going to die – why were they here?

They guided me to a private room and started to prepare me for the worst….

I broke down…

He survived …

He ended up with a broken orb, broken clavicle, lobe damage and a diagnosis of TBI.

The broken clavicle required surgery for bolt placement so he went under…

12 days after being admitted he went from being in critical condition to walking out on his own! I was told over and over by so many doctors this is very rare and they have only heard of someone surviving what he went through and most lost use of their legs…

He had a short set back and was readmitted due to an infection at the clavicle surgery site, which required an additional surgery to clean the wound and all I could think was he is NOT going to die… is he?

He stayed a few more nights and was sent home with a picc line. It was the first time I was alone to be his nurse… I had to go to work and leave him on the couch and hope that he did not start to bleed out at the site. I was a wreck leaving him there …

We made it …

He has gone through physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, and other types of therapy… He has taken physiological tests… he has been measured, reviewed, watched, prodded…

Loved…

He continues (years later) to experience issues with response time, fine motor skill, depression, anxiety, emotion control, a sleep disorder and involuntary limb movement when he does sleep… (there is more)

Sometimes I cry for myself because I am tired, sometimes I cry for him because he is tired and sometimes we cry together…

I have a lot going on … It has been a hard year with a few really good victories!

We are not giving up…
For more information about TBI please visit the below website and remember you never know what someone is going through, be kind, you don’t have to understand it all… just be kind :

http://www.traumaticbraininjury.com/injury-resources/state-resources-for-tbi/ohio/

Christian Turns 4 Years Old

OH my little buddy … Christian is his name … he is a purebred, black Pug !

April 2013

Taken in 2013 – Posing in the green grass with his red walking harness

Christian can be very territorial and likes to bark when anyone visits or comes knocking at the door and he loves to talk to the neighbors dogs by barking through our fence. He doesn’t have any issues ‘acting’ like he is a big dog and he doesn’t mind posing for pictures from time to time.Christian

 

I remember the day I brought him home, he was so tiny and depended on me for everything. He was so small in fact I could wrap him in a hand towel, folded in half. He loved that, I am guessing it made him feel secure being wrapped up in something soft while I held him. Those really early days were precious to me and times I will never, ever forget.

2016 Jan 12 Christian 4 yr old2

2016 Birthday Hat – I turned 4,  Jan 12th !

This month he turns 4 years old and we celebrated with a new toy, a special dinner and a nice red party hat!  He wore the hat just long enough for me to snap a few pictures.

He has gained a few pounds in the last couple of years as he settles nicely into his pug rolls and is happy and healthy in our home… a little spoiled but I guess with a face like that, who wouldn’t be spoiled!              Signature

Christian and I - 3rd Birthday

Christian & Mommy (Me) – On his 3rd Birthday

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUDDY !

 

Solitude Time

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Enjoying time in solitude is a ‘rare’ commodity these days…

I have a full life and I am very thankful for every single minute of it however, a little solitude is essential in order to recharge in this ‘busy, do more’ kind of world.

I recently had the opportunity to get a way from it all – I thought of all kinds of places that I might go from the Amish country to a Casino Resort… and then I found Hueston Woods Resort Lodge!

Preferring more peaceful environments in general, because they make be feel the best… I decided on Hueston Woods Resort for this years solitude time.

I ate delicious food, watched movies, relaxed poolside, participated in lite exercise, filmed videos, took tours, met really interesting staff and by going, found a new place that I never visited before.

I am very thankful for the first solitude time of 2014!

Happy New Year!